I Heard It, and It Was Humiliating, Sickening, Infuriating - This Is the President of the United States, for Chrissakes!

Item: "Even following President George W. Bush's troop surge, private contractors working for the U.S. still outnumber military personnel in Iraq, with roughly 160,000 soldiers and 180,000 contractors.”

Apparently, and while simply a mathematical extrapolation based on experience and knowledge of the military, my intelligence was good when I said more than two years ago that mercenary military – “Steve Canyon” soldiers – in Iraq outnumbered regulars. I sat a couple of nights ago now with wife Rita and exchange student houseguest Phillip in a kind of fascination, like a visitor to a strange country observing some representative of an heretofore never encountered species. Again and again, I thought, “My god – how did this man become President of the United States?” With time – halfway through the speech – I wondered how in hell this twirp managed to graduate from Yale University, then, even, obtain a Masters Degree.

I guess we all know the answer to that one.

His grasp of the things about which he was speaking was always in doubt, tenuous at best. The president, still once more (god – will it never end?) recited the lines handed him like a high school sophomore reading his part in a play by Shakespeare. I was transfixed, frankly - I’ve never been able to grasp that this deeply-flawed wimp is President of the United States. But there he was, delivering the State of the Union Address. It’s surreal. Mind-boggling. My god, I wouldn’t let this guy manage a garage sale for me!

And I still can’t believe it: it’s like all these years ago when I came home from overseas, heard the Beatles, and was informed their amateurish caterwauling and three chord musical stylings had made them millionaires. But there, I suppose, you have it. The Beatles became the Beatles because children had money. And money, in the land of the fee, after all, is power.

And, of course, there you have it – the reason a monumental mediocrity like George W. Bush could be there, addressing a joint session of congress. Money obviously could run and elect Howdy-Doody President of the United States.

For crying out loud, people, this clown couldn’t possibly understand the matters of which he was speaking. I’ll be willing to bet - anyone, and any amount of money – that George W. Bush couldn’t pass a test on even the most rudimentary parts of the Tactical Numerical Deterministic Model (it’s how generals and military people determine the probable outcome of things like the invasion of Iraq) having to do with the war of which he was speaking. I would be likewise willing to bet that he hasn’t the foggiest notion of the mathematics required to calculate the economic projects he was discussing in such knowing terms.

Quick, George (you phony, posturing, patrician popinjay peckerwood), how does one calculate force multiplier for terrain variance, for defender versus that of attacker, force intellect-culture superiority? What is the mathematical formula for casualty effectiveness? How about spatial effectiveness. You blabber and bloviate about the economy, taxes, and the like – well, how does one calculate profit margin for a product in business - cost minimum averaging? How does one calculate the effect of the eight hundred billion dollar expenditure on the lives of working and taxpaying citizens (it’s a factorially factored series – does that help)?

What are the numbers a commander must know in order to decide the “fence” problem having to do with national defense against an enemy like al Qaeda? What are the equations by which any competent commander calculates would compute the Combat Relative Effectiveness Value of an Arab “insurgent?”

Do you, in fact, have ANY expert knowledge of ANYTHING about anything you were speaking last night?

Of course you don’t – you were barely competent to read the god-damned speech (and, George, tone of voice and emphasis often change meaning).

No, of course not. You struggled (“Even a C student can become President of the United States” – remember?”) – which means you cheated by using your political power and patrician prerogatives – to complete even today’s almost laughable requirements for a degree in history. Next, you used the same “shucking and jiving” to power-structure finesse your way to a Master’s Degree in business. You, sir, are in fact a phony fraud, a “Beatle” posturing as a Beethoven, a Pink Panther Clouseau posturing as a Sherlock Holmes, a Charlie Chaplin Hitler posing as an Napoleon or Eisenhower.

Not that all that excuses a society and nation found in the same state of pompous ass acting like a scholar genius as yourself, and not that the emptiness of the President’s State of the Union address wasn’t expected. Anyone who didn’t know what would be said simply demonstrates that he hasn’t been paying attention (of, course, that’s always a majority of a people who want everything in those computer graphics and talk show comedian one-liners), or he has the brain of a grape.

My god, people, this man has only the foggiest idea of what he speaks! You can’t see that?

Instead, for instance, of calling for a more limited role for the menagerie we have for a federal government, George the corporate organ grinder monkey laid out plans that can only increase enormously – and fatally to the economy where middle class and poor are concerned – the plutocracy’s intervention into everything they have already bungled. That means the economy, health care, foreign policy, and education.

With the middle class disappearing even faster than the nation’s infrastructure is decaying, and after seven years of concomitant increase in the government’s pernicious presence in the day to day lives of its constituents, our feckless leader’s solution to our troubles is more of what caused them.

Does anybody remember the Albert Einstein quote, the one that says insanity is doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results. We’re back to the age old question – stupid or evil?

Better yet while we’re remembering – does anybody remember any of previous State of the Union speeches this bombastic boob made? Wasn’t this the guy who was all for those conservative principles of limited government and individual freedom? George, ‘splain to us how you will roughly triple the size of the government while you take a stand against wasteful government spending. Yeah, “‘splain dat to me, Luci.” Your administration has been a model of conservative frugality? Give me a break!

And, by the way, please no more of those “foreign markets” you're going to open. Any more of the kind like China, we’ll all die of lead poisoning and god only knows what else – that’s if the illegal aliens pouring into the country don’t get us first.

Among, in that regard, the dozens of things having to do with government this swaggering jackanapes doesn’t seem to grasp is economics (what can you expect of a patrician prince who has never had to so much as manage a checking account or count his change in his life?). Take for an example the so-called “economic stimulus” plan. Obviously – and it is obvious to anyone who actually sits down and thinks it through to include the mathematics – that the best fix for the recession his poorly planned and bumbling operations in Iraq have brought down on us is anything that will increase business. Meaning anything that permits people to start businesses, businesses that don’t have a federal government monkey on their backs.

And, no, dummy, I didn’t say hand tax breaks to people who don’t pay taxes in the first place – meaning the colossus corporations who own the federal government. If individuals can start business, grow and re-invest, the economy will likewise grow. Instead of increasing the federal deficit by a hundred and fifty billion dollars, the government ought to focus its energy on eliminating taxes that restrain economic growth. That, in case you are as numb between the ears as you seem to be, means taxes the middle class and poor wind up paying in higher and higher prices.

What’s so damned hard to understand about this?! When, under the utterly moronic scheme of things existing now, corporations pay taxes, they add what they pay to the cost of the products. And what’s so damned arcane, so damned hard about understanding how prices and demand relate? Let me explain: if I can’t pay for the damned thing, I don’t buy it. I know I’m a real oddity, but the corollary - lending money to pay for what one can’t afford - is another reason the lenders are in a fix, and the housing market is about to become still another burden on people who work for a living.

If you want people to spend money – “recession” means they don’t, you know – they have to have money. Stop taxing capital gains, get rid of the death tax, and stop making wage-earning people pay taxes at all. Why does anyone have to explain to you booby-troops that people can’t spend the money – i.e., keep the debt-based economy healthy - you take from them?

THE REASON WE’RE IN A RECESSION IS YOU, YOU @#$%&! DUMMY – YOU SPEND TOO DAMNED MUCH!

Oh, and one more thing: in order for folks to spend money, they have to have an income – a job. Just to make that simply enough for you to grasp with that C-student mind of yours, imagine that ALL of the corporations and business owners moved overseas. Or, imagine that illegal aliens took over ALL of the jobs U.S. citizens now do – and sent their wages home to Mother Mexico. What kind of economy would that make?

Are you finished thinking? Good! Now, one more thing on that same subject: giving people back six to twelve hundred dollars of the near thirty thousand of their money you’ve spent on that boondoggle in Iraq is about as contemptuous an insult as a guy like me can imagine. That panty-waist patrician head of yours had better recognize the similarity between something like your “stimulus” and Marie Antoinette’s cake. Remember what happened to her?

No, I don’t suppose; George, they cut her god-damned HEAD off!

And you spoke of education (I don’t suppose it occurred to you, either, that for working people there’s a connection between giving your kid an education and the cost of things, the economy?). That “No Child Left Behind” monument to demagoguery has been exposed by experience for just what any thinking person or one experienced in actually educating kids would have expected. “No runner in a race being left behind” means that everybody swift must wait for those who can’t – or don’t want to – run. It’s been a total fiasco right from the beginning (kind of reminds you of just about everything you ever started, doesn’t it?).

How the hell do you think things will be improved by making everybody as stupid as YOU are?!

It wouldn’t have had a chance even so, but it you had spent even a small part of what you’re blowing on Iraq on funding federal mandates like this one, our public schools would have at least thought you really gave a damn about poor people and their kids education, you posturing, pandering prick! Abolish that White Elephant, the Department of Masturbat… er, Education, let the private sector operate (taxes again, dopey), and let people take local control of having their kids' education. You’ve made the country’s education system another FEMA at New Orleans. Who the hell wants people who can’t get right much of anything – people the watchmen who gave us 9-11 – responsible for educating our kids. Jesus!

Next (as I recall – I spent so much time fuming over the shear asininity of everything you said, the feckless falsity of it all – that I can’t be sure I remember right) there was health care. Same-o, same-o. How anyone can expect that people like our government and you will give us the health care system just about every industrialized nation on earth has is beyond imagining. With 9-11 national security, New Orleans emergency management, the Keystone Kops, Laurel and Hardy invasion of Iraq, and all the rest, we’re to expect anything other than what we have where the public’s health and health care are concerned.

Did somebody say “give me a break?”

George, get the government the hell out of health care! Man, the thought of you characters running a system like that is like watching the doctor who’s going to operate on your heart swig whiskey as he stands over you on the operating table.

George, don’t try to fix things – you’re the reason things need fixing!

Finally, you came to your favorite subject – no, not what a war hero you were; foreign policy. You’ve spent more than trillion dollars of our money on your idea of foreign policy – which is war. That, let me remind you again, is the reason we’re in recession. You’ve always spent money like you didn’t have to earn it (because, of course, you didn’t), but working people know that when a member of the family spends most their money on toys for himself, they’re gonna have to stop buying much of anything else. Even food.

Not only that, but you have turned the world’s knight errant into the world’s playground bully. We defeated the Nazis only to have you turn us into Nazis. Some of us are so damned ashamed of that torture crap, we could puke. Nothing could be worse, but god-dammit, boy, you swore to “protected, defend, and preserve” our Constitution, not use it for ass-wipe! You not only f--- up, sleep on guard duty, you then use the result as an excuse to raid our bank accounts, shame us before all our former friends in the world, you demand that we accept being treated like pets!

God damn it, you feckless fop f--- up (addition of the letters U, C, and K might – in the utterly moronic state we have come to be – explosive), you don’t have a right, because you suspect that the neighbor guy has designs on your wife or daughter, to blow up his house! More, I think it’s about time you and all those bloviating bull-shitter presidential candidates tell us plainly – in detail, dammit; not in the seemingly de rigueur galaxy-wide generalities – what those “American interests” we’re always hearing about are. What business do we have in every damned country on earth?

We go everywhere overseas, blow things all to hell, then re-build them – all at taxpayers expense, while our own bridges, roads, and infrastructure in general crumble and decay from lack of maintenance. What kind of damned fool works on his neighbor’s house while his is falling down?

Oh, yeah - I can just hear it. We have to stay in Iraq because if we leave the other guys will say we lost. They won. That doesn’t sound like a twelve-year old to you? We will be more proud if we stay there and keep killing women and kids? Strewing depleted uranium and god knows what other kind of cancerous pollution around? I’ll tell what, buddy (you were never a fighter, so you’d have no way to know), I’ve lost in competition and elsewhere more times than you’ve done anything right without being shamed or losing my honor. But then, you don’t know anything about honor, either, do you?!

We lost – by your half-assed definition – in Vietnam; what has that done to our “honor?” We’re now trading with Vietnam, are we not? Are you saying that the 58,193 men who died there were dishonored when we left without “winning?”

While I’m on the subject, maybe you and all your wannabe warrior, war-mongering pals should tell us once and for all what “victory” in Iraq means. How do we “win?” When do we know we’ve “won?” When can we leave “with honor?” Maybe you’d like also to explain what you mean by “losing.” What, someone’s going to invade the U.S. and put the nation under occupation? If that’s the case, we sure as hell have spent $16,000,000,000,000 on the military since Word War Two for nothing. Your foreign police is “foreign,” all right – foreign to any kind of even simple-minded rationality.

Bush, you and your Bush League buddies are spending our kids’ and grandkids’ futures. Do one, responsible thing in your entire pusillanimous popinjay life – resign!